Death Before Decaf

Death Before Decaf

There are hills worth dying on. This one is brewed.

Death Before Decaf isn’t a slogan — it’s a personal policy enforced daily by espresso and a complete lack of fear. You’re not “caffeine-dependent.” You’re just chemically enhanced and emotionally unavailable before noon.

Perfect for: baristas, insomniacs, burnt-out creatives, and anyone who’s been asked “Have you tried tea instead?”